- use eye contact more
- try my 'see what happens' opener
- do deep engagement when the set hooks
I went out to North beach, walked around, saw one bar with people, didn't care what it was, just went in. Saw a two set sitting by the bar.
Me: Hi, I just wanted to come and say hi and see what happens...
The set opened well, but didn't hook. It turns out these girls are a bit older than I would've liked. We chatted about where they're from, then movies, and then the interaction fizzled out.
Then I saw a girl (HBDark: 6.5) ordering drinks by the bar. She looked flirty. So I made eye contact, she looked back, I smiled then opened, with a simple "hi, how's it going". It turns out she's here with bunch of friends, a huge mixed set. I introduced myself to her group, then suddenly I was IN... just like that. I started chatting up with HBDark for a bit, but I had problems isolating because her friends kept on coming in at higher energy levels. My energy level is a bit too low for night game sometimes.
Out of nowhere, a huge guy came up and started asking me where to go in the city. It turns out he and his 3 friends are from Belgium and in SF for the weekend. I started talking to these guys, and I could feel my energy go up. I got a 4 set of dudes cracking up, being loud as fuck in the middle of the bar. Sweet! Eventually I got bored, made an excuse, shook hands with them and left.
Talked with HBDark and her friends for a bit, still not really hooking, and can't isolate. After a while, I went back and re-engaged the Belgians. Long afterwards, I realized, these guys became my "home base". Ha! My first home base.
One of the guys is decent with girls, he opened one and all his friends were amazed. Then both he and I saw a girl, HB8.5, probably the hottest girl in the bar. She was getting her drinks and walked right by me. I tapped her on the arm, spun her around. Opened, bantered for maybe a few minutes. At this point I felt really fucking good. Since I walked in, I noticed a seated 4-set of girls by the corner. Now I'm ready to open them. I told the Belgian that I'm going to talk to those girls, he looked at me with disbelief.
I walk over... my first seated 4-set (HBBlonde: 8, HBBrunette: 8.5, HBSister, HBFriend)... here we go.
Me: Hi, (big smile) I just wanted to come here and say hi... and see what happens.
Instantly, I was in, the set hooked. HBFriend asked me for my name, I introduced myself. My intended target (HBBlonde duh!) when she introduced her self we shook hands and I said "you're very beautiful". She blushed, touched my arm and said, "oh stop it". So, my intentions has been made clear to the group. Now here's where I had a little problem. At this point, HBBrunette chimed in, "so you only like one of us right?". In retrospect, I think that should've been a signal to me. The problem will become apparent.
I sit next to HBBlonde, engaging in HBBlonde and HBFriend. I had plenty of stuff to talk about. At some point, HBFriend mentions that HBBlonde has a BF. So I lose interest immediately, but hey, the girls are fun so I keep talking with them. At this point the Belgians leave and come say goodbye to me... massive social proof! HBBlonde and HBFriend go to the bar to get drinks, I let them out, and slide next to HBBrunette. That's when I realized, shit... HBBrunette is really hot. Uh... target switch... when she already saw me talking for a long time with HBBlonde. Hmm... interesting.
I talk with HBBrunette and HBSister (HBBlonde's sister). I was like, "so, tell me your story". She tells me some half-assed story. I was like, okay, I'll tell you a story. So I told her the story of me going to the asian art museum last sunday (true story). Afterwards, she's like, "wow, that was a really good story".
A bit later, HBBrunette leaves and HBFriend comes back. So I say to the two girls, "so, what's HBBrunette's situation? Is she seeing anyone?" They tell me that she might be leaving SF soon b/c job situation... etc.
At some point some a guy friend joins them and he was much higher energy. Basically he sucked all the oxygen out of the room. At this point I decided to eject. I tried to number close HBBrunette, but she gave me the "I have a BF" line. HA! Caught you! If she really had a BF, her friends would've told me pretty sure. I humored her.
I went to say good bye to HBBlonde and HBFriend, they were hustling pool. I told HBBlonde I'm leaving, we shook hands and she gave me a peck on the cheek. Hmm... must have made an impression. I went around and said good bye to all the other ppl that I opened then left the bar. Shit... I was in there for an hour and half? Damn... time flies.
I decided to end my night early on a high note. Took a cab home then decided... nah... one more set. I went to a bar I went last weekend, because I remembered the bouncer's name.
I opened a 2-set. Same opener they laughed. One girl, HBDoc (7.5) said, "is that a line?" I said, "yeah, but it's true." I started to engage these girls finding out where they're from (LA). I told them a story of me visiting LA a few months ago... and I said I found the girls to be really superficial. That was a cold read of sorts, because they definitely didn't fit the LA stereotype. Turns out I was right. They're all medical students from USC. At this point HBDoc's friend moved away... ha... I was isolated.
I brought out my deep engagement stuff. I told her what makes me happy, I asked her if she believed in true love and I told her a story of how I came to believe in true love. I thought the stuff is pretty good. It wasn't all deep, I had her laughing too. I qualified by telling her the last girl I dated... etc. Then I got side tracked by her friends who came back.
At the end, when her group was leaving to go to a different bar, I stopped her. I #closed her while all her friends were waiting.
What I learned:
- having goals at the beginning is really good
- home-base = awesome, even if it's 4 dudes
- I got called out (twice), "who are u here with?" I simply answered the truth, "I'm here by myself". No explanation necessary. Keep on talking. Either they respect you for it or fuck 'em. Both cases, they responded with, "oh good for you."
- at the first bar, I was talking with just about everyone. Shit, it was fun. For the first time I thought to myself, "so this is what being DerekDL feels like" :-D
What I'm proud of:
- created my own 'see what happens' opener
- caught a girl giving me the I have a BF lie
What I could've done better:
- The 4-set... I need to figure out ALL of the logistics and situations before zoning into a target. I think HBBrunette was interested, and she possibly felt bad after I isolated HBBlonde first. I need to do better next time.
- Learn to handle guys who are higher energy than me that enter my set. I don't want to AMOG them, cuz they're friends of the set, but win them over at the same time not let them take over the set.
- I should have kiss-closed HBDoc in the last bar. I had the opportunity to. I will not let an opportunity like that pass me again.
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