Went out tonight with a bunch of guys from the lair. I must admit, I had a pretty shitty night. Despite my best efforts, I realized I wasn't having any fun.
It's unusual for me to not have any fun these days. Last weekend I went out too and I was really feeling it. All the sets felt natural, even when they weren't going well. Today, I was really in my head, and I think I know why.
I got too focused on my 'sticking point', which is escalation. The more I focused on it, the more pissed I got, and the harder I pushed in that direction. Suddenly, I was no longer talking with girls because I liked them, but I talked to them because I want to get over my sticking point. I felt like a hamster on a treadmill. I ran and ran, but stay in the same place. I got frustrated. My night was ruined and I went home early.
You know what, escalation is a problem for everyone learning this stuff. I'm not special, and I'm not going to fix it in one night. Expecting it to magically go away is just asking for trouble. I need to do what I always did well: have fun, be genuine, then add a little bit of sexual aggression at a time. And I'm going to ask for help.
I'm going to take a shower, then meditate. That usually will set me straight.
ps. I'm renaming 'sticking point' to AFI: areas for improvement. Thinking of it as a sticking point is really counter productive for me.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment